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Apr. 23rd, 2025 03:54 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
setsuntamew posting in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png){kind=small}
iconsI'm back at it with another freebie, but this time it's something that reminds me of rainy season I'm in right now~
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vogliaasetsuntamew posting in icons
Daughter-in-law bristles when asked for flight info
Apr. 22nd, 2025 07:41 amambyr posting in agonyauntDear Carolyn: When I asked my daughter-in-law about their vacation destination and flight information, she asked why I wanted to know. I said if there was a crash, I would want to know that it wasn’t their flight. She asked why I was wishing their plane to crash. She also said this type of question takes away her agency.
Sharing flight information is common among my mom friends, so I was surprised. She suggested therapy to handle my anxiety.
I am now feeling very unsure about how to relate to her. She seems to make up a version of me that isn’t accurate and then respond as if that was who I am. I want to avoid conflict with her because this relationship is important to my son. How to proceed?
( Easiest: Stop asking for flight info )
Sharing flight information is common among my mom friends, so I was surprised. She suggested therapy to handle my anxiety.
I am now feeling very unsure about how to relate to her. She seems to make up a version of me that isn’t accurate and then respond as if that was who I am. I want to avoid conflict with her because this relationship is important to my son. How to proceed?
( Easiest: Stop asking for flight info )
van gogh close-ups (25)
Apr. 21st, 2025 05:35 pmtozka posting in iconsExperimenting with zooming in super close so you can see the cool brushstrokes and other details, basically.
Preview:
The rest here atlakertya
Preview:
The rest here at
lakertya(no subject)
Apr. 21st, 2025 06:48 pmconuly posting in agonyauntDear Care and Feeding,
My family and I live down the block from my sister and her family. They went away for spring break to visit her in-laws and tasked my 12-year-old daughter “Blair” with feeding their tropical fish while they were gone.
The day before they were due back, Blair went over in the morning to feed the fish and discovered they were all dead. It turned out that the tank heater had failed at some point during the previous day after Blair took care of them. The problem is that my sister is blaming Blair for “killing” her fish and demanding that we pay for new ones. Blair feels terrible about what happened, but she did a temperature check of the water before she left on the last day they were alive, and the temperature was where it was supposed to be (she had been writing it down on the daily temperature log, so we know for sure), so there was no negligence on her part. I explained this to my sister, but she won’t budge. Now she says Blair and her cousins (with whom she is very close) can’t play together until we pay for new fish. My husband thinks this is outrageous, and I agree. Even so, would buying some new fish be worth it so we can put this in the rearview mirror for Blair’s sake?
—Fish Fallout
( Read more... )
My family and I live down the block from my sister and her family. They went away for spring break to visit her in-laws and tasked my 12-year-old daughter “Blair” with feeding their tropical fish while they were gone.
The day before they were due back, Blair went over in the morning to feed the fish and discovered they were all dead. It turned out that the tank heater had failed at some point during the previous day after Blair took care of them. The problem is that my sister is blaming Blair for “killing” her fish and demanding that we pay for new ones. Blair feels terrible about what happened, but she did a temperature check of the water before she left on the last day they were alive, and the temperature was where it was supposed to be (she had been writing it down on the daily temperature log, so we know for sure), so there was no negligence on her part. I explained this to my sister, but she won’t budge. Now she says Blair and her cousins (with whom she is very close) can’t play together until we pay for new fish. My husband thinks this is outrageous, and I agree. Even so, would buying some new fish be worth it so we can put this in the rearview mirror for Blair’s sake?
—Fish Fallout
( Read more... )
(no subject)
Apr. 21st, 2025 05:25 pmconuly posting in agonyauntDear Care and Feeding,
My sister had her first child when I was 18 and her second when I was 20. (She’s eight years older than I am.) She lives a little over an hour from me, and we’ve always had a good relationship. I watched the kids regularly when I was in college, working around my class schedule, and I continued to do so for many years since, during the summer and on days off from school (I am a teacher). The kids are now 16 and 18, and I have a solid relationship with both of them. I also got married and had two kids of my own.
My sister-in-law is pregnant with her first baby. When I mentioned, at a gathering of my family, the Easter-themed pajamas I had bought for the baby (in what I hope will be the right size for next year), my sister got upset.
She pointed out that I’m “already hosting her [my SIL’s] baby shower,” and complained that I was now “also buying stuff for her baby for a holiday that isn’t even a gift-giving one.” I was surprised. I told her the pajamas were on clearance and I’d picked them up on impulse because they were cute. She responded that I had never bought anything for her kids for Easter when they were young. I said that was true, I hadn’t: I had been a broke college student at the time and also not a parent myself, so my awareness of things like that was much lower. She asked if I was going to continue buying things for that child on every other non-gift holiday—“Saint Patrick’s Day, Halloween, Thanksgiving?” I told her I might if I happened to see something I thought was cute; I jokingly asked if she’d like me to buy matching pajamas for her kids for Halloween this year if I found them.
She got even angrier and said she hopes my SIL appreciates all that I am doing for her because not everyone gets that from their family (very clearly meaning she hadn’t gotten that from me). I told her she was right—not everyone gets $1.99 Easter pajamas for their baby. But maybe some people got years of free babysitting, often with little to no notice, instead of cheap pajamas, because that’s what I was able to give at the time. She got up and left. I tried calling and texting her; she hasn’t responded. My mother has told me that my sister has talked to her about it, that my comment had hurt her, and that I was holding the child care I had done over her head. My mother thinks I should apologize.
I have no idea where this is coming from. It’s very out-of-character for her. I can’t believe she’s jealous about a pair of pajamas (or whatever that gift represents) for another baby when I have always had/still maintain a close relationship with her children. Our brothers also have kids we are both close to, and she has never acted like this. Can I just ignore her unreasonable behavior or do I actually have to address it? I usually have a cookout and host both sides of our family around the start of summer. I’d like to be confident that my SIL won’t be the object of my sister’s wrath that day just because she has the audacity to be pregnant with my future niece or nephew. But how?
—Aunt to Others, Too
( Read more... )
My sister had her first child when I was 18 and her second when I was 20. (She’s eight years older than I am.) She lives a little over an hour from me, and we’ve always had a good relationship. I watched the kids regularly when I was in college, working around my class schedule, and I continued to do so for many years since, during the summer and on days off from school (I am a teacher). The kids are now 16 and 18, and I have a solid relationship with both of them. I also got married and had two kids of my own.
My sister-in-law is pregnant with her first baby. When I mentioned, at a gathering of my family, the Easter-themed pajamas I had bought for the baby (in what I hope will be the right size for next year), my sister got upset.
She pointed out that I’m “already hosting her [my SIL’s] baby shower,” and complained that I was now “also buying stuff for her baby for a holiday that isn’t even a gift-giving one.” I was surprised. I told her the pajamas were on clearance and I’d picked them up on impulse because they were cute. She responded that I had never bought anything for her kids for Easter when they were young. I said that was true, I hadn’t: I had been a broke college student at the time and also not a parent myself, so my awareness of things like that was much lower. She asked if I was going to continue buying things for that child on every other non-gift holiday—“Saint Patrick’s Day, Halloween, Thanksgiving?” I told her I might if I happened to see something I thought was cute; I jokingly asked if she’d like me to buy matching pajamas for her kids for Halloween this year if I found them.
She got even angrier and said she hopes my SIL appreciates all that I am doing for her because not everyone gets that from their family (very clearly meaning she hadn’t gotten that from me). I told her she was right—not everyone gets $1.99 Easter pajamas for their baby. But maybe some people got years of free babysitting, often with little to no notice, instead of cheap pajamas, because that’s what I was able to give at the time. She got up and left. I tried calling and texting her; she hasn’t responded. My mother has told me that my sister has talked to her about it, that my comment had hurt her, and that I was holding the child care I had done over her head. My mother thinks I should apologize.
I have no idea where this is coming from. It’s very out-of-character for her. I can’t believe she’s jealous about a pair of pajamas (or whatever that gift represents) for another baby when I have always had/still maintain a close relationship with her children. Our brothers also have kids we are both close to, and she has never acted like this. Can I just ignore her unreasonable behavior or do I actually have to address it? I usually have a cookout and host both sides of our family around the start of summer. I’d like to be confident that my SIL won’t be the object of my sister’s wrath that day just because she has the audacity to be pregnant with my future niece or nephew. But how?
—Aunt to Others, Too
( Read more... )
Postcolonial Love Poem by Natalie Diaz
Apr. 21st, 2025 07:30 amatlantablack posting in poetryI’ve been taught bloodstones can cure a snakebite,
can stop the bleeding — most people forgot this
when the war ended. The war ended
depending on which war you mean: those we started,
before those, millenia ago and onward,
those which started me, which I lost and won —
these ever-blooming wounds.
I was built by wage. So I wage love and worse—
always another campaign to march across
a desert night for the cannon flash of your pale skin
settling in a silver lagoon of smoke at your breast.
I dismount my dark horse, bend to you there, deliver you
the hard pull of all my thirsts—
I learned Drink in a country of drought.( Read more... )
From Postcolonial Love Poem - pg 1
can stop the bleeding — most people forgot this
when the war ended. The war ended
depending on which war you mean: those we started,
before those, millenia ago and onward,
those which started me, which I lost and won —
these ever-blooming wounds.
I was built by wage. So I wage love and worse—
always another campaign to march across
a desert night for the cannon flash of your pale skin
settling in a silver lagoon of smoke at your breast.
I dismount my dark horse, bend to you there, deliver you
the hard pull of all my thirsts—
I learned Drink in a country of drought.( Read more... )
From Postcolonial Love Poem - pg 1
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Sonnet 7 by Terrance Hayes
Apr. 19th, 2025 11:08 amatlantablack posting in poetryI lock you in an American sonnet that is part prison,
Part panic closet, a little room in a house set aflame.
I lock you in a form that is part music box, part meat
Grinder to separate the song of the bird from the bone.
I lock your persona in a dream-inducing sleeper hold
While your better selves watch from the bleachers.
I make you both gym & crow here. As the crow
You undergo a beautiful catharsis trapped one night
In the shadows of the gym. As the gym, the feel of crow-
Shit dropping to your floors is not unlike the stars
Falling from the pep rally posters on your walls.
I make you a box of darkness with a bird in its heart.
Voltas of acoustics, instinct & metaphor. It is not enough
To love you. It is not enough to want you destroyed.
From American Sonnets for My Past and Future Assassin page 11
Part panic closet, a little room in a house set aflame.
I lock you in a form that is part music box, part meat
Grinder to separate the song of the bird from the bone.
I lock your persona in a dream-inducing sleeper hold
While your better selves watch from the bleachers.
I make you both gym & crow here. As the crow
You undergo a beautiful catharsis trapped one night
In the shadows of the gym. As the gym, the feel of crow-
Shit dropping to your floors is not unlike the stars
Falling from the pep rally posters on your walls.
I make you a box of darkness with a bird in its heart.
Voltas of acoustics, instinct & metaphor. It is not enough
To love you. It is not enough to want you destroyed.
From American Sonnets for My Past and Future Assassin page 11
Creative Jam
Apr. 19th, 2025 12:17 amysabetwordsmith posting in crowdfundingWelcome to the 142nd Crowdfunding Creative Jam! This session will run Saturday, April 19-Sunday, April 20. The theme is "Empowerment."
Crowdfunding Creative Jam
Everyone is eligible to post prompts, which may be words or phrases, titles, images, etc. Prompters may request a specific creator, but everyone else may still use that prompt if they wish. Prompts may specify a particular character/world/etc. but creators may use the prompt for something else anyway and post the results. Prompters are still encouraged to post mostly prompts that anyone could use anywhere, as this maximizes the chance of having creators make something based on your prompt. Please title your comment "Prompt" or "Prompts" when providing inspiration so these are easy to find.
Prompt responses may also be treated as prompts and used for further inspiration. For example, a prompt may lead to a sketch which leads to a story, and so on. This kind of cascading inspiration is one of the most fun things about a collective jam session.
Everyone is eligible to use prompts, and everyone who wants to use a given prompt may do so, for maximum flexibility of creator choice in inspiration. You do not have to post a "Claim" reply when you decide to use a prompt, but this does help indicate what is going on so that other prompters can spread out their choice of prompts if they wish.
Creators are encouraged, but not required, to post at least one item free. Likewise, sharing a private copy of material with the prompter is encouraged but not required. Creative material resulting from prompts should be indicated in a reply to the prompt, with a link to the full content elsewhere on the creator's site (if desired); a brief excerpt and/or description of the material may be included in the reply (if desired). It helps to title your comment "Prompt Filled" or something like that so these are easy to identify. There is no time limit on responding to prompts. However, creators are encouraged to post replies sooner rather than later, as the attention of prompters will be highest during and shortly after the session.
Some items created from prompts may become available for sponsorship. Some creators may offer perks for donations, linkbacks, or other activity relating to this project. Check creator comments and links for their respective offerings.
Prompters, creators, and bystanders are expected to behave in a responsible and civil manner. If the moderators have to drag someone out of the sandbox for improper behavior, we will not be amused. Please respect other people's territory and intellectual property rights, and only play with someone else's characters/setting/etc. if you have permission. (Fanfic/fanart freebies are okay.) If you want to invite folks to play with something of yours, title the comment something like "Open Playground" so it's easy to spot. This can be a good way to attract new people to a shared world or open-source project, or just have some good non-canon fun.
Boost the signal! The more people who participate, the more fun this will be. Hopefully we'll see activity from a lot of folks who regularly mention their projects in this community, but new people are always welcome. You can link to this session post or to individual items created from prompts, whatever you think is awesome enough to recommend to your friends.
Crowdfunding Creative Jam
Everyone is eligible to post prompts, which may be words or phrases, titles, images, etc. Prompters may request a specific creator, but everyone else may still use that prompt if they wish. Prompts may specify a particular character/world/etc. but creators may use the prompt for something else anyway and post the results. Prompters are still encouraged to post mostly prompts that anyone could use anywhere, as this maximizes the chance of having creators make something based on your prompt. Please title your comment "Prompt" or "Prompts" when providing inspiration so these are easy to find.
Prompt responses may also be treated as prompts and used for further inspiration. For example, a prompt may lead to a sketch which leads to a story, and so on. This kind of cascading inspiration is one of the most fun things about a collective jam session.
Everyone is eligible to use prompts, and everyone who wants to use a given prompt may do so, for maximum flexibility of creator choice in inspiration. You do not have to post a "Claim" reply when you decide to use a prompt, but this does help indicate what is going on so that other prompters can spread out their choice of prompts if they wish.
Creators are encouraged, but not required, to post at least one item free. Likewise, sharing a private copy of material with the prompter is encouraged but not required. Creative material resulting from prompts should be indicated in a reply to the prompt, with a link to the full content elsewhere on the creator's site (if desired); a brief excerpt and/or description of the material may be included in the reply (if desired). It helps to title your comment "Prompt Filled" or something like that so these are easy to identify. There is no time limit on responding to prompts. However, creators are encouraged to post replies sooner rather than later, as the attention of prompters will be highest during and shortly after the session.
Some items created from prompts may become available for sponsorship. Some creators may offer perks for donations, linkbacks, or other activity relating to this project. Check creator comments and links for their respective offerings.
Prompters, creators, and bystanders are expected to behave in a responsible and civil manner. If the moderators have to drag someone out of the sandbox for improper behavior, we will not be amused. Please respect other people's territory and intellectual property rights, and only play with someone else's characters/setting/etc. if you have permission. (Fanfic/fanart freebies are okay.) If you want to invite folks to play with something of yours, title the comment something like "Open Playground" so it's easy to spot. This can be a good way to attract new people to a shared world or open-source project, or just have some good non-canon fun.
Boost the signal! The more people who participate, the more fun this will be. Hopefully we'll see activity from a lot of folks who regularly mention their projects in this community, but new people are always welcome. You can link to this session post or to individual items created from prompts, whatever you think is awesome enough to recommend to your friends.
Lullaby on Mount Moriah by Traci Brimhall
Apr. 18th, 2025 06:35 pmatlantablack posting in poetryThe lullaby I wrote on your throat about the stained
hilt of the knife in my hand begins — Whisper, or snow
will come and make its sadness famous in your mouth.
The why of you a radiant devilfish, the what of you
a fat little soul bluing at the edges.
The surest way to receive a free ram is to tie your son’s hands
behind his back. Offer me a metaphor, God said.
Abraham stretched Isaac out on a rock, Like this?
( Read more... )
From Come the Slumberless to the Land of Nod pg. 6
hilt of the knife in my hand begins — Whisper, or snow
will come and make its sadness famous in your mouth.
The why of you a radiant devilfish, the what of you
a fat little soul bluing at the edges.
The surest way to receive a free ram is to tie your son’s hands
behind his back. Offer me a metaphor, God said.
Abraham stretched Isaac out on a rock, Like this?
( Read more... )
From Come the Slumberless to the Land of Nod pg. 6
heart custom icon
Apr. 18th, 2025 07:05 pmsetsuntamew posting in iconsI've started a new community based around customized freebie icons and this is the first icon I'm offering there~ plz check it out if you're interested in that sort of thing- or would be interesting in joining as a maker!
request your own @vogliaa
request your own @
vogliaa
Follow Friday 4-18-25
Apr. 18th, 2025 01:24 amysabetwordsmith posting in followfridayGot any Follow Friday-related posts to share this week? Comment here with the link(s).
Here's the plan: every Friday, let's recommend some people and/or communities to follow on Dreamwidth. That's it. No complicated rules, no "pass this on to 7.328 friends or your cat will die".
A Series of Gentle Reminders by Rudy Francisco
Apr. 17th, 2025 10:07 pmatlantablack posting in poetryDelete the number,
trash the boxes
give the sweaters away.
Stop holding onto things
that do not fit you anymore.
Clutter has many faces.
Forgive them.
They didn’t apologize,
and you’re still mad,
but what I do know is this:
a closed fist
can punch through a wall,
but you can’t fix the hole
until you open your hands.
The past
is one of the few things
more stubborn than we are.
It will not change
and doesn’t care if
you have a better idea
of how the story
should’ve ended.
( Read more... )
from Excuse Me as I Kiss the Sky pg. 119-121
trash the boxes
give the sweaters away.
Stop holding onto things
that do not fit you anymore.
Clutter has many faces.
Forgive them.
They didn’t apologize,
and you’re still mad,
but what I do know is this:
a closed fist
can punch through a wall,
but you can’t fix the hole
until you open your hands.
The past
is one of the few things
more stubborn than we are.
It will not change
and doesn’t care if
you have a better idea
of how the story
should’ve ended.
( Read more... )
from Excuse Me as I Kiss the Sky pg. 119-121